Why did the sea captain go on so many dates?
Because she knew there were other fish in the sea.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?
Why are books always so angry?
What's a dentist's favorite movie?
Why is furniture so generous?
What's the slowest 5k?
Why do lawyers always go to Japanese restaurants?
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you.
Why don't skeletons ever go trick-or-treating on Halloween?
Why do Olympians never overheat?
What's the most popular hairdo on a farm?
Which vegetables have the hardest time swallowing their food?
What do you call an emergency in the spring?
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
Someone stole all my lamps.
Why did the vampires cancel their baseball game?
Why do churches struggle with counting money?
Where do mixed drinks always go for dinner?
Why are ET's eyes so big?
What do you call a magical reptile?