Why do moms have to visit the optometrist twice?
Because they also have eyes in the back of their heads.
What did the baby laptop call her father?
What's a chip's favorite way to score in basketball?
What kind of flowers are the best for Mother's Day?
What animal always goes to heaven?
Who is the nicest celebrity around?
Why did the baby wrap itself in paper strips and move to Egypt?
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
Why don't skeletons ever go trick-or-treating on Halloween?
What did Michael Jordan sell at the farmers market?
What did the mother worm say to the little worm who was late?
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?
Which celebrity would make a great valet?
Why don't guitarists handle stress well?
Why is heaven always so tidy?
Which singer could always break a five?
Where do polar bears vote?
What do you call a Zen egg?
What do you call a famous turtle?
What does a cat go to sleep on?
Why don't poodles brush their teeth?